


i found love where it wasn't supposed to be (right in front of me)

by HogwartsDwarfKat



Series: Obikin Week 2k18 [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Ahsoka as Obi-Wan's padawan, Ahsoka is only mentioned, Anakin never became a Jedi, Angst with a Happy Ending, Ani and Obi have a force bond despite never haveing met, Because of Reasons, Day One: Never Found AU, Fluff and Angst, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Never Found AU, Obikin Week, Obikin Week 2k18, Obikinweek, Shmi lives!, So is Shmi, That's Not How The Force Works, The Force Ships It, also some of my own headcanons on Tatooine Slave Culture is thrown in here, and dream of each other, and have visions of canon occassionally, but do I care? not even a little, easy to ignore, implied BDSM relationship, it's there if you squint, obikin, obikinweek18, sorta?, which is sad because they are amazing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2019-06-10 22:19:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15301251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HogwartsDwarfKat/pseuds/HogwartsDwarfKat
Summary: Anakin is never found by the Jedi, but grows up dreaming of a red-headed Jedi.---Obi-Wan is a Jedi Knight, but in dreams, he finds love with a blond-haired stranger.---A.k.a. The Force ships it.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is for Obikin Week 2k18, Day One: Never Found AU  
> P.S. this is my first ever Star Wars FIc and first ever Obikin Fic, so tell me what you think?
> 
> (Title from the song "I Found" by Amber Run)

When he was younger he had dreamt a splendid dream: a man with a sword of light crossing the desert, coming to whisk him away, with him was an Angel, as beautiful as she was kind. They would transverse the sky together.

He would be _free_.

Every day he would wait for them, stare out the window to see their silhouette, listen with ears of a krayt to the chime of the bell in the junkshop. Soon the days flew by, then weeks were devoured by months, and months by years.

The Jedi never came.

\-----

So many lives were lost that day, but they had won. The Queen could rebuild and so could the planet, but the Jedi doubted his heart ever could.

Qui-Gon was dead.

Qui-Gon was dead and he was blowing up the command ship.

It was his fault.

At least he killed the one responsible before the Queen was lost as well.

The red-head doubted he could ever go back to that throne room, that palace.

\-----

Anakin never stopped dreaming as he grew older and earned enough to free his mother and himself.

Somedays he wanted to throw the glimpses of another life away, the snatches of laughter, the crispness of an off-world accent he couldn’t place yet knew it to be from Corescant. The tickle of a braid he knew was never there.

Other days he longed to lean into the echo of an invisible hand on his shoulder. Wished to curl into the warmth of a voice calling him ‘Dear One.’ Longed for the days when he felt himself wake to a nonexistent kiss upon his lips, the feeling of another’s beard brushing his cheeks.

Never wanting to open his eyes, knowing he won’t wake to see the grey-green eyes that twinkle at him in his dreams.

He always does eventually but remembers his mother’s words to never lose the dreams that mean the most to him.

\-----

The Clone Wars rage on, and sometime Obi-Wan will see a flash of blond hair in the sun, hear the thrum of a blue lightsaber he knows isn’t there. Feels his soul scream out that it shouldn’t be _Ahsoka_ he calls his first Padawan.

He goes on fighting, ignores the feeling that something - _someone-_ is missing, at least until it is time to rest alone in his tent.

Only then in his sleep does he let himself dwell on it. Let himself feel the mouth on his, hear the breathy moans of pleasure, feel the fingers trailing down his body teasingly, draw red lines along the back that he can only touch in these moments.

He does not think of how he clutches tight to the blond after their heartbeats have stopped thrumming and their breath has been caught after these moments of ecstasy. Does not think of all the pet names that spill from his lip unbidden: Dear One... Darling... Beloved... My Good Boy... Love... Does not think of how it all reeks of attachment.

Nor how sweet it smells.

\-----

That is how life carries on, phantom touches, whispers from the untouchable, drawn-out conversations in dreams half remembered when the time to awake comes.

Hauntings of a lifetime not lived and a lover’s touch at night, sometimes in the sandy dunes beneath a binary sunset, others in a tiny bunk aboard a ship, on a small, threadbare bed beneath the ground, within a room in the hallowed temple.

One day while he is remembering a hand in his hair, gripping the strands of gold, Anakin has a waking dream of a sun-worn face, lines like canyons around the eyes he recognizes as belonging to his mirage lover. He looks as threadbare as his robes, his lightsaber braced in front of him as those beautiful eyes of his close. Before Anakin could even blink he disappears into nothing but a pile of clothes, and then the image is gone. Instead there is only the racetrack in front of him.

 He takes a gulp of water, and wonders if it had been real or if the Twins were getting to him.

\-----

Dooku is dead at his hand and the Jedi wonders if he should feel ill at the thought, guilty for taking a life. The Chancellor had praised him for his actions, but that does little for his heavy thoughts. All he could think was that the blade he saw take the Count’s head was not his own, the hilt similar, like a distorted image in a trick mirror, but distinctly not his.

He knows he was the only one to see it.

Obi-Wan wonders if this strange connection is a blessing from the Force, or a test he is so badly failing.

He finds he cares very little as he falls into the blue-eyed man’s arms. Traces the scars on the other’s back from an electro-whip from years ago and thinks of how long and brutal it must have been to actually leave marks. Tonight, in this fleeting infinity, they just hold one another and caress the other’s face. Exchange sweet kisses as they gaze longingly, as if trying to carve their partner into their memory so deeply it will last longer than the galaxy.

In the morning Obi-Wan will know that he is a terrible Jedi, but he will not mind -he has not been a good one in a very long time.

\-----

It has been weeks since he has last dreamed. Anakin wonders if he did something wrong, if the Mother Krayt is punishing him for the panted “Master” he uttered like a prayer the last night he and his love touched.

The thought that the word slipped through his lips should horrify him. And the part of him that is still the newly-freed teen swearing to never call another that word again is, but it is a distant kind of horror. It did not feel like he was giving up his hard earned freedom, more like an endearment muttered a thousand times...an honorific...a pet name even...

Before he has time to think on it further he sees the news in town, a few weeks delayed in getting to the backwater Outer Rim planet.

His heart shatters at sight.

The Republic is now the Empire, but that is not what sends him to his knees breathless: The Jedi are now hunted as traitors. Apparently, they tried to strike a coup by killing the Chancellor, he reads absently as his eyes are glued to the holoscreen as the reporter reads out the names of those already “apprehended.”

He wishes they would show the faces, so when they read his name Anakin could gaze upon the face one last time now.

\-----

He should be looking for any other survivors, should be a good Jedi Master like they all thought him to be.

Instead he leads his padawan as they go from transport to transport, planet to planet, and system to system, his mind on a sea of sand, a binary sunset, and eyes as blue as the sky.


	2. Author Note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Series Update

Hey everybody, I just wanted to let everybody who wanted a continuation and subscribed to this story that there is a sequel! It's called 'say you'll see me again (even if just in your wildest dream)'. You can find it by going to the next part of the series!

Lots of Love,

HogwartsDwarfKat

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and feel free to ask any questions about the fic or the universe it's set in.  
> You can find me at my tumblr @youbeyouillbemelove


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